Your story hits close to home. So much love to you. I am sorry for the pain that you and your family are going through. Feel free to contact me anytime. I can listen and understand. Much love, Debbie
My deepest appreciation to your family for sharing Layne’s story. I’ve had the great pleasure to work with Amy in Cincinnati, and she brought to me the beautiful bag and gifts to help me remember our son who was born still a month ago. Our story is similar to another I read. I went in for a quick checkup on my way home at 17 weeks, trying to squeeze in the appointment between work and picking up our other 3 children on my way home. Typical pregnancy checkup, the doctor asked how things were going, they were fine, moving along. I got up to leave and book my 20 week ultrasound, he was asking if we were going to find out the gender and who was coming with me, at which point he noted that we forgot to check the heartbeat. We almost didn’t check during the appointment. I laid back down while he got the doppler out. We continued general conversations about what we had done over the holidays. He said several times, “oh, there it is…, wait, it moved, I can’t get it to hold still, its moving around and causing feedback on the doppler, lets just hop on the ultrasound.” We walked to the next room, still in our holiday conversations because there was no concern at that point. He told me, he had heard it. I was thinking about what I was going to cook for dinner that night while the ultrasound was firing up. He was still talking holidays when the image pulled up, and then he stopped and was quiet. I didn’t realize, I was looking at the features which were now formed, thinking about how amazing it was. Then he just said he was sorry, he was so sorry. I looked at him, truly not understanding what he meant. I looked back and forth from him to the screen and finally realized I didn’t see the flicker of the heartbeat. I felt like it wasn’t real. I had never considered not having a healthy baby, this was our fourth. They admitted me immediately and our son was delivered about 12 hours later, and within 24 hours of everything, I was back at home on my couch, not pregnant, and only three kids in our home. It was so jarring, so quick and unbelievable, I truly struggled to believe if I was awake or not for several days. We didn’t even have a name picked out, we didn’t know it was a boy until he was born. Our other children, 5, 4, and 2, have had lots of questions. They had been so excited to meet the baby. We would talk each week about how big the baby was, and that was all gone.
We’re so sorry for the loss of your beautiful daughter. We’re still in the beginning of our grief process and journey, and I deeply appreciate the package and your family sharing Layne Grace and her story and memory with our family. –Emily Fay
Hi Jaclyn, We are so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your story about Millie. I am sure she was a beautiful baby girl. Much love to you and your family. May you always remember and feel her love. Sincerely, Debbie layne’s mom
In 2013, I was 24 weeks pregnant and went in for a normal check up at the OB. My NP was laughing and talking to me while trying to find our baby girls heartbeat on the Doppler! After a few minutes she was becoming a little more quiet and said that she must be hiding so let’s do an ultrasound. I had a gut feeling immediately! We went into the US room and the tech got everything started…. Again… I knew! As she was looking for our precious baby girls heartbeat, I said there wasn’t one. Sadly, she agreed! We went to the hospital to be induced and once blood work was started, they realized I had HELLP syndrome (a severe form of preeclampsia). After about 33 hours later, I delivered the most perfect angel! Upon leaving the hospital, we were given a the “Layne’s Grace” bag. I have never looked at a butterfly the same way without thinking of our baby girl, Millie!
Layne Grace Brummit
Layne, born almost 6 years ago now, has become an inspiration to our whole family. While we were devastated when she was unexpectedly born still in October of 2009, her parents have never stopped efforts to keep her little spirit alive by helping other families who suffer such a loss. Through Layne bag donations to local hospitals, visits with other bereaved families, a Hike of Hope in Burbank, California, or belonging to bereavement councils at hospitals, they find comfort through letting others know they are not alone when such a tragic loss happens. The act of helping others is cathartic and our whole family is able to focus on other families who need comfort. It eases our loss. We hope that all of you who read this and have found yourselves in such a dark time will find a way to help yourselves, never forget, but move forward with hope in your heart. We understand your sadness!